I still tell myself that I killed Emily, despite the veterinarian telling me, after her body had been taken away, while I gripped both a counter and a vet tech to keep from collapsing,
that all four of her paws had been bloodied as she had clawed at the floor, the door and the ground during her manic and desperate attempt to get away from my home.
Things I Wish I Had Known When My Dog Died -
On Jan. 4, 11 years and 26 days after I walked out of an animal shelter in New Jersey with a little white
and brown dog attached to the end of a brand-new leash, she died.
One problem with pet loss, said Mary Brosnan, a social worker who runs the group in Manhattan, is
that a lot of people don’t see a pet dying as a real reason for grief since it’s an animal and not a person.
The pain still catches me, though, and I can now more clearly see why: I loved
that dog, and in giving a scared, abused, imperfect Emily a home, she loved me back, and together our lives both bloomed.
They may tell you other dog death stories, too, like the one about the dog who was so excited to be home from vacation
that he bolted out of the car and was immediately run over while the whole family watched — stories that imply it could have been worse.
Jen A. Miller is the author of “Running: A Love Story.”
The Animal Medical Center offers free, bimonthly pet loss support groups that draw people from all over New York City and the suburbs.
I went back into therapy after she died and was told I was depressed, which wasn’t surprising,
as I had started to slip into bed at 8:30 p.m. and not get up until half a day later.