1. “I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with ’em later."<br />—Mitch Hedberg<br /><br />2. “Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This is the war room.”<br />—President Merkin Muffley (Peter Sellers), Dr. Strangelove<br /><br />3. “My mother always used to say: The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”<br />—Rose (Betty White), The Golden Girls<br /><br />4. “Halloween is the beginning of the holiday shopping season. That’s for women. The beginning of the holiday shopping season for men is Christmas Eve.”<br />—David Letterman