Ambulance please come quick br We have a medical emergency br There is a person here quite ill br They need fixing with some urgency br br What is the problem may I ask? br So we can send the right supplies br Nicotine levels are very low br They must be raised, or this man dies br br Oh my God, that sounds quite serious br I’ll send the paramedics right away br Let me know if breathing stops br Then we may have to start to pray br br So what drugs are you going to bring here? br To fix this poor person up br They are feeling very poorly br I think that they have suffered enough br br Well actually no drugs can help this person br It’s hyponicotinaphobia that they’ve caught br Could you repeat that please br Did I hear it as I ought? br br Yes, you heard correctly br I’ll translate to you from Greek br A fear of low nicotine in the blood br Is what’s making this person freak br br Sure, we can elevate nic levels br By pumping some more in br But that will not remove the fear br So it will not be such a win br br This hyponicotinaphobia br How do we remove this fear br By reading doggerel such as this br Is one way and it’s right herebr br Alessandra Liveranibr br