Here are a few things I’ve learnt since I started going out, br You start any bother then you’ll be thrown out, br That’s the first thing I learnt because I seen so many peeps get burned, br Thrown out by causing a fuss, br Then picked up on the street by the fuzz, br Next always remember to bring your ID, br Because there’s always a bouncer that thinks you look a about three, br Now you show him it and smile like you’ve fucked his wife, br Then quite quickly he’ll let you in without embarrassing you, br Next always bring enough cash, because enough brass, br In time will get you a good looking lass with some class. br br I’ve been here and I’ve been there, br I’ve been here and I’ve been everywhere, br I’ve been sick and I’ve been slick, br I’ve been king and I’ve been sin. br br Next always ask the girl you’re chatting up her age, br Because if you don’t you could end up inside a cage, br You could think she’s 18 and find out she’s younger, br And wonder how a 14 year old looks 18 years old, br It’s an old story told but its some advice you must hold, br Be bold don’t stammer you’re words. br Because you’re words are weapons, br That threatens or charms anybody that you really like, br And I quite like to do both to cause alarms, br I warn you alcohol does go straight to your head, br And you could tread on a hateful son of a bitch. br br I’ve been here and I’ve been there, br I’ve been here and I’ve been everywhere, br I’ve been sick and I’ve been slick, br I’ve been king and I’ve been sin.