Ever since my grandfather died and my heart br starts to turn black from sorrow. br I lost my myself from the black hole br deep within. I cried to myself thinking to br myself will i ever be myself one day. br My heart used to have one door br and ONE! door only but br now it like an million doors and an limitless hallway br with each door having a different piece to find my true self br but every door i tried to open are locked, nailed, and lockdown br it was stressful enough that i have to keep my family on br track but it hard for me sometimes. br Anger starts to build up br Sadness start to freeze the lungs br and depression starts to cut the vain out of my body br but pretty soon it felt like something is br consuming this pain of mines and loving every moment br of it.