Overwhelmed by impatience; reading letters br from him, time has stopped, minutes take hours br and hours take ages to pass, I can’t wait anymore, br I can’t stand the noise of the clock and the sound br of my nieces’ voices, I can’t listen to uncle slurping br tea and music from the TV, I can’t wait for the sun br to rise and then to set again; I can’t listen to mouths br chewing and footsteps in the passage; I can’t stand br calls to the dogs and trucks coming and going; I br can’t stand lights switching on and the moon rising; br I can’t stand preparing meals and then eating then br cleaning; I’ve passed my ability to be calm and br content; I can’t wait any more; I can’t remain in br my skull; I can’t be me anymore, can’t sit quietly, br can’t listen to my own thoughts; all that remains br to break this chain suffocating me, tightening br around my neck, is to cry; all I can do is seek relief br in tears; abandoning myself to sobbing away my br grief and my fears; I’m growing hysterical – I can’t br wait anymore, I can’t wait, I can’t and I won’t and br I need to get away; to run to a place where I can be br alone and the silence is complete; I need to conjure br a vision of his face and meet him in my dreams; br I can’t breathe and live on; I’m going to run and br run and run until it is quiet and I’m on my own; br please let me see him again, please bring him to br me, please; I’m going mad with impatience, please, br I need to be with him, I cannot live without him…br br Louise Tredouxbr br