A self-discipline deficiency negatively influences br my self-esteem - compounded by lack of listening br skills - carry magazines when attending meetings; br cannot even listen to OWN consciousness stream br subject to a toxic cocktail of chemicals br br Body shuts down after eating certain things br cannot comprehend any of the words in front br of me, feels like competing against successful br athletes while I’m paralysed - forever lagging br behind – only half a mind functioning br br Limped down to the library, returned without br a book, allergy making it impossible to think br clearly and I couldn’t find the desired read; br knowing my hero* read War And Peace in br three days while I refuse to consider it br br Fearing Russian poignancy, so let me tackle br a new day and try to learn self-discipline br br br [*hero: Nelson Mandela read Tolstoy’s War and Peace br in 3 days]br br Margaret Alice Secondbr br