My neighbor raped my mule last night. br I decided that it was time for us to fight. br He talked tough but I wasn't going to take his sass. br I broke my twelve inch foot off in that pervert's ass. br When I kicked his ass today, I kicked it hard. br He didn't waste any time getting out of my yard. br My poor mule will be scarred for life. br I made a phone call to that pervert's wife. br She told me that she intends to get a divorce. br I locked my barn because I also own a horse. br If you own a mule, you should listen to what I tell you. br Hide it and hide it well because you know what he'll do. br br (THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM.