Did I tell you about the fracas I got into at br my church? I was in the little church store br admiring a small metal crucifix with a br wooden base. Then I saw that they wanted br $39.95 for the damn thing! I told the lady br working there that that was a rip-off. She br explained that it was hand-made. Hand- br made? I told her these things are churned br out by the thousands in Asian sweatshops. br So she said the Lord would be pleased if I br spent the money. I said yeah, right, like the br Lord told you that. She kept throwing out br dumb arguments. Finally, she called in the br church heavies and lied to them that I was br harassing her. These two guys came, called br me “Sir, ” and told me to leave, but I said I br didn’t have to. So they tried to grab me and br we struggled and some stuff got broken br (their fault) . I was able to kick one of them br in the head. You’d have been proud of me. br I put up a good fight. But they finally threw br me outside. As I lay there on the sidewalk, br one of them said to go home and dry out. As br if I’d been drinking! So I’ve started working br out at the gym. I’m getting bulked up. Those br church goons are in for a surprise.