Now this lady she parades round her shopping mall br She admires herself as she stands strong and tall br She window shops the jewellers but doesnt buy a thing br But somehow comes home all kitted out in Bling br br She spends many a night gambling her benefits on strip poker br But loses the lot to her friend the pawn broker br She begs her future hubby, shes so desperate she'll rob br 'If you want gems my love you'll have to go get a job' br br Hes doing a stretch in prison - got hammered with 'life' br For selling his poor seventy five year old wife br She was the first bride that he met on the net br But his obsession for bling got as hard as it could get br So he made out an advert that said 'Lady of the night' br And put up her pic on that famous auction site br br Now Earnest he sleeps with Babs pic by his bed br The magistrates have solemly granted they wed br But poor old Earnest Bling aint a penny to his name br So his dear fiancee Babs takes a job 'on the game' br br Now the happy day arrives, her dress black and gold pleat br Along comes handcuffed Earnest -who has freezing cold feet br 'Im jilting you darling Ive been foolish you see' br 'Marriage is for life and I need to be free! 'br br Lisa Cresswell Wilkinsonbr br