I have just been given bragging rights
Yes it happened tonight
Before the sun gave its final shine
Carefully a 30 pound 4 ounce watermelon was pulled from its vine

Yes I do believe that entitles me to the right
To brag and make a little sight
Pictures upon the scale I took
No, it will not go down in a book

But it was grown with my two hands
On country land
Where my certificate to brag is framed
And yes it has been proclaimed

By a witness standing at my side
He almost fell over and died
When the scale tipped over thirty
And all I could say is, Isn’t it purdy*

Patricia Gale

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/bragging-rights/