Marlene, a famous grammarian, spent her final years br if-ing and because-ing and whether-ing, br neither-ing and nor-ing: trying to connect br the intricate clauses of her past. br br In her younger years she had to-d br and before-d, of-d and until-d, br making each preposition a loaded proposition br dangling at the corner of her lips. br br She smeared her middle years br with nouns, like Love and Beauty, br and her yearning for immortality br was reflected in her use of infinitives: br to live, to engage, to aspire, to create. br br Now, at 94, she feels that language br has betrayed her; she wonders br if she has identified the mechanics br of speech, the expression of living, br but failed to see the underlying br current behind the words. br br In conquering speech so precisely, br in defining so eloquently the meaning br of being alive, she has neglected to live it.