At the time, br I knew it was my fault br When dinner wasn't right br And you threw it across the room br And forced my arm up my back. br I knew I was unreasonable too, br To text you when you didn't come home. br I ached far more inside then br Than the blue and black and yellow showed. br You were right when you told our friends br How stupid and ugly I was, br And I knew I was lucky br That you chose me. br Surely you were right as well br When you said, ' No pain, no gain', in our room br And said it showed how much you loved me. br I cried so much before, br Not from shock and pain br As I got up off the kitchen floor, br Or staunched my nose, br Or waited for my breathing not to hurt, br But from the guilt and shame br Of making you do the things br That made you hurt so much. br From pushing you so far that you punched br The words and situation, never me, br Then had to cope with your own tears after br I'd made you into something you're not. br I used to miss you so much br When you weren't there. br Then I missed you when you were, br But I stamped inside br And you stamped outside br As I reaped what I sowed. br I was afraid you'd go, ashamed, a nag, br Nosey, a burden, useless, interfering, lazy, thick. br And guilty.All my fault.Guilty.