I have always expected to be happy in my mind br there I wanted to experience euphoria br and jubilant jubilation, br br but instead br what I feel is in my body br not a voice I am used to br listening to. br br Where does happy live; br apparently not only in the mind; br br if it did br happy I would be. br br But Body Happy br is new to me. br br It is Peace; br unhurried br drama-less br Anxiety Free. br br I am taken away br here br and not on alert br and attention; br rather br like melting; br br ego-less, br br which at first felt br threatening br but I could feel br a br Thunder br in my being br spreading br tingling, br explosion br at the end br orgasms br intensely; br a diffusion br of self, br uncontrollably, br a diffuseness, br and I br and me br gone br away br over-powered-ness; br all very different br than Mind Happiness. br br Could I allow it to happen br again? br Could I be coached br to feel it again.? br br We'll see. br br Next chapter br is tonite.