Fell asleep last night with the TV on, br Oh, what a dream I had. br Dreamed I went and answered ev'ry single br One of those late night mail order ads. br Then four to six weeks later, br Much to my surprise, br The mailman came to my front door br And I couldn't believe my eyes. br br He brought the Vegematic br And the Pocket Fisherman, too, br Illuminated, illustrated History of Life br And Box Car Willie with a ginsu knife, br A bamboo steamer and a garden weasel, too, br And a tie dyed day-glow souvenir shirt br From Six Flags Over Burbank. br br Well, the doorbell rang all mornin', br All through the afternoon, br And I shook with fright as it rang all night br By the light of the Mastercard moon. br There was Federal Express in the pantry, br br Parcel Post in the hall, br COD to the ceiling, br And I just couldn't pay for it all. br br I got an egg scrambler br With a seal-a-meal carryin' case, br A set of Presidential Commemorative Plates br So I could eat my eggs off a President's face, br A minute mender br And a needle that'll knit or crochet br And an autographed photograph of Rin Tin Tin br At Six Flags Over Burbank. br br Well I know that I was dreamin' br So I gave a mighty cheer br When I awoke, it was no joke br 'Cause all that shit was here, br So if you fall asleep with the TV on br Let me tell you what to do. br Rip the telephone out of the wall br Unless you want this to happen to you. br br You get Vegematic and the Pocket Fisherman, too, br Iluminated, illustrated History of Life br And Box Car Willie with a ginsu knife, br A bamboo steamer and a garden weasel, too, br And a tie dyed day-glow souvenir shirt br From Six Flags Over Burbank.