I've written funny poems, written a heap of those br But sometimes all that rhyming gets up people's nose br So I thought I'd try proper stand up and use words which didn't rhyme br I enrolled in a stand up comedy course to become a stand up comic sublime br br The first task we were given was to write down ten things that we hate br Should be easy I thought, but could barely think of eight br Then we had to write down ten things which made us feel afraid br Rebecca said the fear of revealing fears was one which on her mind weighed br br Our teacher Rob, likes his lists of ten and I couldn't expostulate br Because even if two were crap, you still had the remaining eight br This is going quite well I thought, and I'll no longer sound like Pam Ayres br Because, quite frankly, the stuff she does, does anyone really care? br br We listened to a bit of Derek and Clive, comedians from the past br And I have to say their humour still packs quite a blast br To call the buyer of their record a fool, well they didn't quite use those words br And then play a few moments of silence, is the funniest thing I've ever heard br br So I hope you like my attempt at not putting everything in verse br I've just done a proper stand up routine, and you heard it here first! br br (Sydney, Australia - 2010)br br Alessandra Liveranibr br