I am a different kind of feminine - br an aberration. br A woman, but not in the conventional sense of the word. br Men see me as an anomaly, br irregular, odd. br br Physically, I am a woman, br possessing all the biological traits br that make me like other women. br But that is where it stops - br I am peculiar, br (so they say) br I am a far cry from what br men gawk at! br br Does that make me less of a woman? br It seems that the external br overshadows the internal br and I am left dumbfounded and perplexed. br br I seem to be attracted to men br yet men are repelled by me. br I am intrigued by women, br because of my butch persona - br I seem stronger than when br I am around me br who consider me br un-dainty, clumsy and cocky. br br This contradiction br has me swinging back and forth br leaving me in a quandary. br br I want to fit in br and yet the elements br are saying otherwise.