lying awake in the middle of the night br when the world is almost dead br with the rain drops dripping one by one br it feels as if the sky is raining my tears; br br fear, that’s what keeping me awake, br as i close my eyes and try to slam it shut, br it begins to creep and crawl all over my senses, br starting with the most obvious and br branching out to all corners of the mind; br br why? what? how? so many questions, br yet very few answers, as the mind br spins its intricate web over my confidence, br leaving me high and dry, gasping for breath br and keeping me wide awake; br br as i lay on my back with my br hands under my head, br staring at the darkened ceiling, br uncertain and confused; br br it was not supposed to be like this, br no one mentioned a word about this, br staring vacantly at the darkened ceiling, br i could not sleep; br br trying not to lose myself, br my mind keeps thinking about br the if’s and the probabilities, br without a care about the present; br br and in the end, it was all a little too much to take, br as the fear of the unknown surround me from all sides, br and darkness creeping its way up slowly and steadily, br the nightmares loom larger and bigger, br blurring everything else before i collapsed into a restless sleepbr br kendyll brownbr br