I never have clung to a motor car, br Or crouched on a motor bike. br Worry and scurry, clank and jar br I cordially dislike. br br I do not care for grimy hair, br For engines that explode, br But of one and all I've the put and call, br For I live on the Ripley Road. br br I drank the country breeze at first, br Unsoiled by fetid fumes, br But now I am cursed with a constant thirst br That parches and consumes. br br I am choked and hit with smoke and grit br When I venture from my abode ; br My pets are maimed and my eyes inflamed, br For I live on the Ripley Road. br br I pass my days in a yellow fog, br My nights in a dreadful dream, br Haunted by handlebar, clutch and cog, br And eyes that goggle and gleam. br br I am not robust, but I dine on dust br Gratuitously bestowed, br And for twopence I'll sell my house in the dell br By the side of the Ripley Road.