Objects and things I can dream about br intrigue me, but political speeches close br my brain down, as I force my eyes to the br page of my translation document analysing br political history, the synapses stop flashing br and my brain cells stop working br br Ere long I feel ill and have to take a walk br to wake up again, over and over I try to read br these boring lines, look at positive affirmations br but they only work if we really want to accomplish br something; I do not really want to repeat political br inanities so trying to indoctrinate myself br br Is not working, I have eaten mountains of healthy br foods to make me strong to tackle my enemy, I have br taken medicines till they spill out through my ears, but br still I cannot carry out my task, I am a moral failure, my br conscience cannot guide me to carry out a job I am paid br for, I am willing to die the death of the ignominious br br For my inability, I cannot force another morsel of food down br my throat, cannot read another positive affirmation; politics is br my nemesis, I cannot distance myself from the duplicity and br self-serving diplomacy; all the fairies have deserted me as br they cannot stand the inner turmoil as I try to kill myself in br an attempt to do what I hate and abhor br br Another slow death is all that is left for my future…br br Margaret Alice Secondbr br