I pass to the other side of the page. br -Pablo Neruda br br On the other side of the page br where the last days go, br where the lost poems go, br where the forgotten dreams br breaking up like morning fog br br go br go br go br br I am preparing myself for death. br br I am teaching myself emptiness: br the gambler's hunger for love, br the nun's hunger for God, br the child's hunger for chocolate br in the brown hours br of the dark. br br I am teaching myself love: br the lean love of marble br kissed away by rain, br the cold kisses of snow crystals br on granite grave markers, br br the soul kisses of snow br as it melts in the spring. br br On the other side of the page br I lie making a snow angel br with the arcs br of my arms. br br I lie like a fallen skier br who never wants to get up. br br I lie with my poles, my pens br flung around me in the snow br too far to reach. br br The snow seeps br into the hollows of my bones br & the calcium white of the page br silts me in like a fossil. br br I am fixed in my longing for speech, br I am buried in the snowbank of my poems, br I am here where you find me br br dead br br on the other side of the page.