Sometimes I think br of how you are hardly br alive, br of how we are all br hardly br alive, br br dodging bullets, br dodging raindrops, br skidding on the ice br of Connecticut br winters, br narrowly missing br death br by botulism, br death in its br rattling can, br death by jaw, br death by womb, by cock, br death by br telepathy. br br When I think of br your nuclear dreams br & the way you fuck- br head turned sideways br as if you saw br the Last Flash br (& were shielding br your eyes br with me)- br I think br that we are all br marked br beyond repair br by the notion br that even death br can die, br br & that our children br will not know br the unutterable joy br of buying br their parents. br br I bury you. br You bury me. br Our ages do not br matter- br since I am br life to you, br love, mother, br aunt & anodyne, br poet, playwright, br repairer, sharer br of your most secret br self. br br & what are you br to me? br Son & brother br that I never br had- br clandestine Claudius, br hamstrung Hamlet, br mescaline Malvolvio? br br What I want br to tell you br is that br I love you. br br Impermanent br as we are, br may you br love me.